I’m not kidding.
Ted and Booster were in the first comic I ever read (Justice League of America #34), but surprisingly, Guy and Tora were my first ever comic ship. I mean, a real one, not like Batman/Catwoman or Superman/Lois which I’d picked up from the cartoons. Yes, I liked these pairings, but I wasn’t as madly in love with them as I was with Guy and Tora. But I digress.
In my head, which is not always the safest place to be at night, Guy and Tora have been dating for several years now, including the time before she died. And he’s never stopped loving her, even if he has sought out relationships with other people. If there was anyone in the DCU that Guy Gardner wouldn’t mind spending his life with, it’s Tora Olafsdotter. And since Max made the world remember him again, Guy is obviously un-whammied and back in love with Tora, after a lot of “I’m so sorry I thought you were crazy, baby, I love you I really do and I’ll always believe you over what my head tells me from now on, promise. Want a puppy? I will go get you a puppy right damn now if that’s what it’ll take for you to take me back.” on his part. But since Guy has his own series (and it’s been pretty dang good so far), he’ll probably only appear in the new JLI monthly on occasion, as his series takes place in deep space. So after a few storylines come to pass (24, maybe 26 issues in), Guy shows up on Earth to take Tora out. They do mostly things she likes, which makes her suspicious because Guy only really butters her up like that if he has bad news, or if something is going on with the Corps that’ll keep him away from Earth for a few months. She asks him what’s up almost directly after he offers to take her to a place in Norway that actually has fried seal for dinner. He gets quiet. Sighs. She wrings her hands.
“Tora, baby, you know I love you, right?” She nods. “You’re the world to me, the universe. And I’m probably the worst boyfriend, always off in deep space and missing anniversaries and your birthday that one time. But you, you’re something else. You’ve given this slob more chances than I deserve, an’, I just want you to know how special you are to me.” He reaches into the pocket on his jacket, pulls out a box. He opens the box. In it sits a silver ring with a Paraiba Tourmalines stone (they’re blue/green). She gasps. “I can’t offer you as much as you deserve, but I can swear on everything I am that I’ll never be unfaithful, or give you any reason to doubt me. I’ll always do everything in my power to make you happy, and I’m never going to just up and leave you ever again. Tora, will you marry me?” She cries, it starts snowing, then she kisses him. He grins. “So I guess I can take that as a yes?”
And that’s that scenario.
Bringing Ted back to life is less complicated, but would take at least 3 issues. First off, Booster would be the one to do it, obviously. He’s friends with Brainiac 5 now, and after a few trips to the past, as well as a few to the far future, he and Brainy cook up an imperfect Ted Kord clone. It can’t really think for itself, but it can parrot phrases. After that’s all over and done with, Booster recruits either Jesse Quick or Wally to switch clone!Ted with real!Ted at the very last second. Tearful reunions abound. But, it’s all a big secret. Only the JLI, and some members of the Batfamily, are allowed to know that Ted never actually died. To the rest of the world, the second Blue Beetle is dead. I mean, y’all remember what happened when Everyman was impersonating Ted in the Manhunter series, right? Almost got Wonder Woman arrested for needless murder. Anyway, Ted builds a new life in Gotham under the name Theodore Garrett, but spends most of his time with Rip and Booster in the Time Bunker. When he’s not secretly saving the world, he works in Kord Tower under Babs’ direction, and is very amused about it. Tim stops being a wad long enough to fanboy over Ted. Damian is unimpressed…until Ted manages to disarm him and pin him to the ground when the brat mocks his pudge. Robins fanboying over Ted Kord is my new favorite thing, by the way. Obviously, at some point, Rani calls Ted and Booster her two daddies. I have way too many ideas about this to feature in one post, honestly.
And that’s what I have to say for right now.
Bringing back something from last year.